The problem, though, is that what you are saying is that people of color should smile and be respectful when a community's mods and many of its members are insulting them and being extremely disrespectful. Do you see the power imbalance here? There have been many posts already made about this question of "tone," and the way in which it deflects attention from the real issue. But I'll just say this: Why do I have to be sweet and gentle with people who are treating me like I'm not even human?